Psalm 84:2

My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the Lord, my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God. - Psalm 84:2

Let that sink in. Wanting something so badly that you and your body cry out for the want of it. Living in the United States, it's hard to imagine that sort of want. Our towns are filled to the brim with places that have every imaginable thing that a person could desire. Our homes are veritable warehouses for the things that we accumulate. So, can I honestly say that I've craved anything so much that my heart and soul cried out for it. So much so that it caused physical pain because it wasn't there. Not really. This sort of craving isn't something common. This sort of craving isn't something that can be taken care of with tangible objects. I've spent a lot of time this week, praying over and contemplating this verse. Because seriously is there anything that I crave so much that I cannot get readily?

Obviously there has been. Looking at my person, there's obviously something missing. Something lacking, because if there wasn't, I wouldn't be in the position and the condition that I'm in. Sure, I could just say that I hate exercise or I hate to deny myself anything. That's inherent in all of us, but what is it exactly that prevents me from seeking better. Why do I cover my TRUE feelings and cravings with being sedentary and eating things that do not benefit my body or my mind?

I don't have the answers. I'm not sure I'd be happy with them when I figure them out. I know that since I've come to the Lord and have started really listening to what God is saying, I've found myself not desiring food or things that aren't good for my body and therefore not glorifying to Him. Does that mean that I don't have a sweet or a salty snack. Sure. I do. I don't think they are WRONG, they are just wrong in the way that I abused them. Moving my body praises God. It's how he designed us. We show supplication with our bodies. We show our devotion to him with our bodies. We raise our hands, rock on our feet, lay prostrate before Him when we feel His presence.

These are the things muddling about in my head when I think of this verse. There isn't enough time during this week to get to the bottom of how this verse has affected me. So I'll have to keep on reflecting on it, and myself and get to the bottom of my issues.